Tuesday, September 13, 2011

I Gots Me a Penis!

OK, so I'll admit I'm kind of behind on my reviews. I should have done this a million years ago, but hey, whatever. So what's my new toy for today? Well, since I don't have a penis myself and I needed one to go with my Minx, I decided to invest in a Mr. Limpy packing dildo from the shop I trust.

How do you use it?
Mr. Limpy is not meant to be used for penetration; he is instead meant to be used for packing! Which means he can be used by those who would benefit from wearing a fake penis, such as post and pre op trans people, cis people, and other gender variant individuals. Mr. Limpy does not have a little "post" ( I can't think of the word for it) in the back, so when you pack him, you have to hide his balls as well.

It's awesome for those who are looking for their first packer; but it's not ideal for the super thin and short crowd. I'm 5'0" and he is definitely a bit on the longer side for me. 

What is Mr. Limpy made of and how do you clean him?
 Mr. Limpy is made Superskin, which is not at all body safe. He kind of smells (like rubber?) and it will irritate those with sensitive noses. I didn't taste him. The description lists that Mr. is velvety, but I think slightly sticky is a better description. I found that he didn't irritate my skin when I wore him, which makes him ideal for long term use. He is also very, very floppy, which makes him wonderful to be worn under a loose pair of jeans or a pretty dress. He is not meant to be used a regular dildo, however.

When I tried to jack off my Mr., my hand was slowed down immensely by the drag of the toy. If you desire to minimize the drag, use a little bit of water based lube.

Mr. tends to attract all objects under the sun; when he fell out of my harness, he attracted hair, dirt and things I didn't know that existed in my carpet. So if he needs to be cleaned, make sure you wash him with SOAPLESS water and dust him with a little bit of cornstarch (NOT talcum powder or baby powder. I would wash before and after every use.

What does Mr. Limpy look like and how big is he?
Mr. could never pass as a real penis, because he's kind of really pink. Not Barbie pink, but more pink than what a real penis should be. The Eden picture actually makes a little more pink than it really is, though.

Mr. is 6 inches in total, with an "insertable" length of 5 1/4 inches. He has a diameter of 1 1/4 inches with a circumference of 4 1/4 inches. He doesn't have a "post" in the back, so like I said, when you pack him, you'll have to pack with the balls inside underwear or the harness.

How is Mr. Limpy packed?
He comes in a plastic bag with no information whatsoever and that's pretty much it. I wish it came with more substantial packing, but what are you going to do.

So what did you think of Mr. Limpy?
Before I got my Mr., I was kind of opting for the Mr. Right caramel packer because 1. he was made of silicone and 2. the caramel color would have matched my skin perfectly. The price tag was kind of a turn off (because I'm broke, thanks college) so I opted for Mr. L instead. He's really way too pink for me, so that was minus #1 for me.

Mr. and I started off with a rocky start; when I packed him in my Minx, he decided he didn't like it and slid right out. Luckily, I was in my room so the only one to see this mishap was my best friend and the carpet. Mr. was pretty filthy after landing, and he's not the easiest to clean. After monkeying around with it for a little bit, I finally got him to stay, but he tried to slip out again when I went for a walk. (Honestly, I think I need to buy a tighter d- ring).
Long Penis

I'm pretty short ( a whole 5'0") so a regular size penis on some is going to be ridiculously long on me. He goes to my mid thighs, which I think is pretty long for a cock.

I barely wear pants, but in the name of science, I wore him with a tight pair of jeans and he tends to leave a little lump. He's best worn with a loose pair of jeans or a dress.

I'm happy that I have a packer, but I do wish he was made of a more body healthy material and was not so damned pink. I will admit, I do get a power rush when I wear him though; there's something so liberating about wearing a penis with balls, despite the fact that he's incredibly pink and really... limpy.

If you still like Mr. Limpy, you can use my affiliate code TKR to get 15% off your whole order.

product picture
Packing dildo by Fleshlight
Material: Superskin®


  1. What a lovely penis you have! Thanks for the review. Nice pic! I wonder why they would of made him so long. If you had an actual cock they do not hang down like that.

  2. i know! it's kind of weird, but i guess i got to tuck him in haha i think i'm going to try to find a smaller option, just so it's not so damned noticeable

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